Choices
Over the Christmas season we have enjoyed time with our children and grandchildren, including looking after two of the grandchildren for a couple of days while their parents had a much needed rest. “If I had known how wonderful grandchildren were,” the joke goes, “I would have had them first!” Those of us who have children, whether our own or adopted or foster children, know how wonderful they can be and also how challenging they can be.
Grandparents can enjoy time with children but then hand them back! It’s their parents who have to decide on the key things.
It was not the nappies or the sleepless nights that really bothered me as a young parent - though they were a real challenge. It was the uncertainties. We loved (and still love) our children immensely and want the best for them. But how to respond to a youngster who cries for an hour? Is it frustration or tiredness? Is it a sign of mistreatment? Is there an emotional trauma? Is it temper and wilfulness? Is it serious illness? Should we call the doctor?
As a grandpa, on the rare occasions I am in sole charge I am not too worried about a messy nappy at the most awkward moment, and I can always think of fun and games. But there are times when parents just do not know what is best, so how can grandpa know?
How do we make good choices? Time and time again the scriptures point us to God as the source of wisdom. James helpfully promises “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.” (James 1:5).
We often put ourselves under pressure to get it right, to make the right decision. Sometimes Christians assume there is just one course of action that God intends us to take. But I have found it very freeing to realise that I do not have to make the “right” choice all the time, just a wise choice. If it turns out really successful then good. But if it turns out that it needs to be adjusted or even reversed, then godly wisdom enables us to change the plan. Good result either way!
Wisdom is not about getting specific answers to detailed questions but enabling us to make wise choices. So we ask for wisdom - not answers - because God does not make us robots but sons and daughters.
We might have choices to make about how to have fun with the grandchildren or how to handle a tricky situation at work, or even whether to take a new direction in life this year. Whatever the choices may be, God gives wisdom and enjoys partnering with us as we make them!
- Chris Horton
Grandparents can enjoy time with children but then hand them back! It’s their parents who have to decide on the key things.
It was not the nappies or the sleepless nights that really bothered me as a young parent - though they were a real challenge. It was the uncertainties. We loved (and still love) our children immensely and want the best for them. But how to respond to a youngster who cries for an hour? Is it frustration or tiredness? Is it a sign of mistreatment? Is there an emotional trauma? Is it temper and wilfulness? Is it serious illness? Should we call the doctor?
As a grandpa, on the rare occasions I am in sole charge I am not too worried about a messy nappy at the most awkward moment, and I can always think of fun and games. But there are times when parents just do not know what is best, so how can grandpa know?
How do we make good choices? Time and time again the scriptures point us to God as the source of wisdom. James helpfully promises “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.” (James 1:5).
We often put ourselves under pressure to get it right, to make the right decision. Sometimes Christians assume there is just one course of action that God intends us to take. But I have found it very freeing to realise that I do not have to make the “right” choice all the time, just a wise choice. If it turns out really successful then good. But if it turns out that it needs to be adjusted or even reversed, then godly wisdom enables us to change the plan. Good result either way!
Wisdom is not about getting specific answers to detailed questions but enabling us to make wise choices. So we ask for wisdom - not answers - because God does not make us robots but sons and daughters.
We might have choices to make about how to have fun with the grandchildren or how to handle a tricky situation at work, or even whether to take a new direction in life this year. Whatever the choices may be, God gives wisdom and enjoys partnering with us as we make them!
- Chris Horton
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